The Kübler-Ross Model
The Kübler-Ross model is the pathway that someone will take in the emotional course of a loss or grief. It is an explanation how grief or loss can cause Depression or Anxiety if there is no acceptance.
If this has happened to you, through the route of the Kübler-Ross model, you will find the route through. Depression and Anxiety from a tragedy or mental illness is alleviated via using this model. It is the westernising introduction to Mindfulness.
Loss – Grief – Depression
The Kübler-Ross Model shows how Grief comes from Loss and will lead to Depression. The model demonstrates that the progression of grief which is measured by energy and satisfaction will lead to Acceptance. The model outlines 5 Stages you must go through to achieve Acceptance:
Denial- This can’t be happening to me?
Anger- God, where are you? Why are you letting this happen to me?
Bargaining- I will do anything to change this.
Mental Health- I have a low mentality rate. Why continue to have Hope.
Acceptance- It’s going to be okay.
Denial is a stage in Kübler-Ross' model that can firstly help you deal with something traumatic. It is a time where thoughts are empowered with positivism if you use them right, instead of negativity. You may start to deny the news and you may go numb. This numbing may lead straight to acceptance which is a danger to yourself. In the denial it is a common trait to find yourself wondering how life will go on because you enter a state of shock. This is because life as you knew it, has changed instantly at the news. With the diagnosis you might think there has been a mistake in the results and that the diagnosis is wrong. This is a natural part of the denial process.
In the denial stage you may be living in a non-reality, rather than living in a preferable reality of sorting through your options.
Denial however can help you to cope with shock and overwhelming grief that can turn into depression. It is thoughts of shock that can help you through the stage of denial. Shock aids in pacing your emotions and feelings of grief. In grief we deny it is true and do not accept it.
Once denial is overcome and the shock starts to fade, then the healing program can begin with an action plan. At this point, your feelings that you were suppressing will come to the surface. Get treatment straight away.
After the initial denial you will start to live in a reality to the illness and not the preference of denial where nothing is usually achieved. In the anger stage it is common to have thinking such as 'Life is not fair to me' or 'Why me'? You may find you start to blame others for the mental grief you feel and also direct your anger at family and friends that are close to you. That is what counselling groups are for! Somewhere where you can let your anger out. I am suggesting though that you keep your positive outlook. I say this so as you can know without a shadow of doubt that all outcomes will be in your favour.
You will find it unfathomable as to how this could have happened to you. If you have strong religious ethics, then you might start to question your belief in God. This however is normal and God as you know is part of your salvation. You may think 'Why did he not protect me'? Scientists and mental health workers find agreement that anger is necessary for some when grief overcomes them. Anger can be a powerful tool if used correctly, but do not do what I did and deny help from so called silly therapy and counselling groups. Many professionals encourage anger stages. It is an important part - to build up a willpower against the illness. Even though it may seem like the anger will never dissipate and that the anger cycle is a never-ending cycle, it will and it will make you stronger as well. The more you find anger quicker, the more quickly it will dissipate into empowerment of thought and your emotional actions. Thoughts and strong emotions empower the body to heal if they are positive. It is not a healthy situation for your body if you suppress anger as it is a natural response. It is necessary to empower you with courage. In the normal and everyday life, we are usually told to keep our anger under control towards people and events in life. Anger for some can cause anxiety and this is something that you will need to take the courage to overcome with deep breathing exercises, yoga and meditation. There is also cognitive behavioural therapy with a trained counsellor.
You need to be thinking that anger is a strength and it can bind you back to an empowering reality. You may feel deserted and even abandoned during the grief of diagnosis, but you are not. Get and receive all the help you can get and take out the anger in counselling groups. In this way the healing process of anger will dissipate and empower you with healing properties. Anger is a thing that is necessary. It is something for you to grasp onto and a natural healing process that empowers your bargaining skills towards life.